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E M P O W E R E D P A R E N T I N G E Z I N E
http://www.EmpoweredParent.com
Information For Today's Parent!

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VOL. V : Issue 4 April 6, 2003
Editor: Joan Bramsch
E-mail: hijoan@joanbramsch.com

Common sense solutions for Today's Parenting Challenges!
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Empowered Parents = Strong Families
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THIS WEEK'S EDITION SPONSORED BY:

"Abandoned For Life: The Incredible Story of One Romanian Orphan, Hidden From The World. His Life. His Words." By Izidor Ruckel. You saw it on ABC 20/20 News years ago. Now find out what happened to some Romanian orphans who were saved - and those who were left behind.
A True Story. Includes FREE Photo Album sampler. Now available on CD-ROM and as a instantly downloadable PDF document. Http://joanbramsch.com/romania.html

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INSIDE YOUR EP EZINE
<*> Letter to Parent
<*> Article
<*> Letters from EP Parents
<*> This 'n That
<*> Marketplace
<*> Subscribe/unsubscribe Information
===============
"You do what you know how to do; and when you know better, you do better."
- Maya Angelou
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<*> Letter to Parent

Hi Dear Parent,

All those who know I'm a WYSIWYG Kid, raise your hand! New EP subscribers are excused from this test; however, with your first ezine, I think you'll know, I'm pretty much "What You See Is What You Get!" :).

The reason I ask is because we have to talk. Parents consider me an expert on things parenting. I would say, having almost fifty years experience in marriage and motherhood, I've learned some things and I talk about them here and in my web site articles and books here - http://www.EmpoweredParenting.com

As my years as Ask Parent Joan have evolved, I'm not so keen on writing about bedwetting solutions, or getting your child to eat properly, or other day to day "stuff" that constitutes childcare. There are a ton of sites that thrive on these topics, which are necessary, I know.

Instead, I have been evolving more toward the philosophy of parenting which encompasses larger issues. Like providing you with tools so you can teach your child how to think. It's learned, you know? Those little babes don't pop out filled with reason and logic; it has to be carefully taught. We can teach our Child how to think, only if we ourselves possess that skill.

I also am not shy about my beliefs. Like

"What you think is what you get, or what you give attention to, is what you attract into your life."
That fear is a negative force which rules the lives of many.
That when we reach a crossroad in life, if we stop, get still, breathe and "listen," we will know which path to take toward our Joy.
Very important: to slow down, knowing you don't have to do it all, that quality time with your Child beats a new designer shirt or computer game or CD, 100 to one.
That having a few good rules is best, and those rules are enforced consistently.

I tell any Parent who'll listen: Enjoy your Child now because s/he will be graduating from college "tomorrow afternoon!" Honestly, it does go that fast! Perhaps, faster.

I have always been a teacher, I expect, because I believe it's a sin to hoard information. That feeling has only accelerated since 9/11. And somewhere I have found more courage, as well. I think that may be rising higher in my "composition" because in the last two years, I've suffered four terrible blows from death, two major surgeries, and the challenge of living alone for the first time in my life, and yet, I am still alive and know I have work to do.

The pain of these challenges has changed me; I say what I think these days. To be sure, I continue to be as kind and as clear and as logically as I can be, but I am a child advocate more today than yesterday, and I am a peacekeeper.

Somewhere deep inside my soul I have found more courage than I ever knew I had. That courage permits me to have my say -- nicely :) -- because, to be honest, dear Parent, I've seen the dark side, the sad side, the terrifying side and it didn't kill me. So the experiences have made me stronger.

This Month I'm publishing early, although I may publish later, too; however, there are lots of wonder-filled articles and sayings I want to share with you. And especially I want to share a "Leap Forward" reminder site. Http://www.eakles.com/DST.htm They're playin' my kinda music! :)

And speaking of music, if you are like me and always wanted to play piano or keyboard and never had the time, I have found the Perfect answer in this web site: http://www.playpianotoday.com/ David Sprunger is now a friend (You know how I think Friends are the best collectibles :) His site is so loaded with FREE lessons that you'll soon prove to yourself that you can do it. Then purchase his CD lessons. A six-month course equals the price of one quality music lesson in St. Louis. I am so glad I found his site, but did I really find it? There are no coincidences, are there? :)

I love you. I send you peace and calm.
Joan

P.s. This issue's Top Article is an answer to all the parents who answered the survey questions, asking for help in communicating with their Teen. I promised you help and here it is. :)

P.p.s. There are lots of thoughtful information topics and a fun quiz, too. I got them all right except for one of the colors on the Campbell's soup cans. Rats!

P.p.p.s. "Abandoned For Life" is now available as an instantly downloadable PDF document. Http://joanbramsch.com/romania.html

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I'M A WINNER AND SO ARE YOU!
Everyday I beat my own previous record for number of consecutive days I've stayed alive!

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UNDERSTANDING $$$s - do the Math!
1 Million seconds = 12 days
1 Billion seconds = 32 years
Human species is 1 Trillion seconds old.

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<*> Article

SPECIAL THANKS TO RON. LOVE, JOAN

Ten Secrets Teens Want You To Know!

By Ron Huxley, LMFT
http://parentingtoolbox.com

In my years of work with teenagers, I have learned some very important secrets that might interest parents. It wasn't easy getting these secrets. Your teen will probably deny all of them. For some, it is so secret, even they are not consciously aware of it. But trust me, once they know that you know about what most of them know, it will improve your relationship. What do I mean? Let me show you by telling the first secret:

Secret #1: Teens want parents to know them.

It doesn't seem like a big deal? It my opinion it is huge. Teens have worked hard to convince adults that they don't want them "butting into their lives." On the surface this is true. But deep down they do want to share with us their fears, joys, and dreams. The main reason they don't just open up is that parents discourage it with analysis, judgement, and lecture. To cover up, they make those weird funny faces like parents are the one's from another planet. Teens are biologically driven to differentiate from their parents. The problem, psychologically, is that they don't know what they want to be instead. They just know what they don't want to be you! It's called an identity crisis. The challenge is to get to know teens gracefully, without raising their defenses, and share with them some of the wisdom parents have learned since adolescence. The remaining nine secrets will help you do just that.

Secret #2: Teens are troubled by peer pressure. Almost every teen I have talked to will say that peer pressure is not a big thing. They tell me adults overrate peer pressure and you can see why with all the drug campaigns flooding the media with peer pressure messages. They don't want you to know their secrets (outwardly) and when the media blasts the truth about peer pressure on television, radio, and billboards their cover has been blown. What is a teen to do, except deny that peer pressure has any power over them? Take their dress for example. To us adults, they all look the same and yet every one of them will maintain their uniqueness. Point out that any two are wearing nothing but black clothing and they will correct you that they are wearing very different styles of black clothing. Ironic, isn't it. But you can't convince them differently, so don't bother trying. As teens differentiate from mom and dad, they turn to their peers for support and guidance. Not all these peers give good advice. Those junior "Dear Abby's" are lost too.
The challenge for parents is to get teens to accept values that will steer them through their turbulent years. Part of the solution is to give teens something to say "yes" to, instead of telling to "just say no" to harmful substances and behaviors. Since peer pressure is so powerful, why not use it to the parents and teen's advantage by finding organizations and groups that have healthy peers to influence them. Take teens to church youth groups, community recreation programs, and police-sponsored activity leagues. If you don't have one in your area start one up. Involve teens in the ground rules at home and school. The more they are involved in the process, the more likely they will follow those rules. It also communicates that their thoughts and ideas are important. If their rules are unacceptable (too lenient or unrealistic) talk about the problem and find a middle ground. And as much as they say they hate it, discuss values and peer pressure with children. Don't argue, lecture, analyze, or judge them for their thoughts. They are still on the learning curve and usually their responses are naive and exploratory. Another way of saying it is "Guide them, don't force them." Take small opportunities in the car, at the dinner table, or in the middle of a project together. This makes everyone more relaxed and comfortable to discuss uncomfortable topics.

Secret #3: Teens perceive the world with emotionally charged lenses. To the teen, life is techno colored. To us their world is sensitive, moody, and often dangerous. As their hormones kick into high gear, they go from feeling manic and on top of the world to depressed and at the bottom of the barrel, all in a matter of moments. Don't go get prescriptions filled yet. It is simply part of being a teen and fortunately, doesn't last forever. The more parents understand the ebb and flow of teen energy, the better they will cope.

The challenge is to channel this energy into positive outlets. Find opportunities for them to be active and involved and learn how to swing to the mood music. Although parents don't want to overload their teens, they do need a balance of activities that focus their mental, physical, and emotional energy. Allow your child to have a "bad" hormone day from time to time. See the long view. Tomorrow they will be back up again. Don't talk about the mood swing and create defensiveness and don't blame them for their mood swings. Don't excuse it either, just don't make a case of it. The less pressure from adults, the quicker the positive moods will come back up.

Secret #4: Teens have very few time management skills. "Who does," you say? Exactly my point. If we, the adults, don't have good time management skills, why would we expect teens to have them. Who would they learn from if not us. But even if we are the most punctual of people that is no-guarantee that our teens will be. They might act as the exact opposite in an effort to find their own identity.

The challenge is to help teens learn to use their time wisely. That might involve become better time management models ourselves, suggest time management techniques, and doing nothing. We have already mentioned that we need to be good models if we expect our children to manage their time but watch for signs of poor school performance, inattentiveness, and excessive sleepiness. These signs may point to deeper, emotional problems. In some cases, time management skills may help. In others, it may require more professional help. Suggest, don't lecture on time management. Teens will save face if they pick up a technique "on their own" that you suggested. And if they don't you will have to decide how important the situation is to know if you should strongly suggest, demand, or do nothing. Parents must decide what is negotiable and nonnegotiable with their teen. Perhaps having a messy room is negotiable ("clean it at least once a month" or "no food left as science experiments under the bed") while daily chores and doing homework are not. Teens can be good manipulators so it is good to know this before hand.

Secret #5: Teens like the practical and social side of school. Although some teens will talk about school as if they are being forced into manual labor or tortured by sadistic criminals disguised as educators, the truth is that they find a lot of reinforcement from school and actually like learning. Vague statements, by parents, that they must study history because it's good for them will never work. Telling a teen that they must study Algebra in order to get into a good college won't be very motivating either. They need to see the more pragmatic or social side of school.

The challenge is to help teens understand why they need to learn various subjects in school. Talk with your teens teachers about the concrete objectives of each class. Find practical uses for it in daily life. Build in connections with past learning to show a continuum of learning over time. Have teens' brainstorm practical uses for the concepts they are learning. Or go the other way and talk about what they are interested in doing in life and how different subjects are necessary to accomplish that goal.

Secret #6: Teens want limits placed on them. This is perhaps the most startling secret of all. It is also one of the most unconscious secrets for teens. When they have limits, they don't realize their need for them but when they don't have any limits placed on them, they do realize their importance. One teen, whose mother died of a drug overdose, had lived a very unsupervised, unstructured life. He told me that he liked having his foster mother put limits on him. This was puzzling to me, given that he rarely followed them, but he stated that this is what it felt like to have a "mom who cares for you." And he eventually did adjust to the structure and start following the rules.

The challenge is to know how much and how often to set limits. Loving children is the easy part of parenting. Setting appropriate limits is not so easy. The world is still unknown to teens and consequently they need someone who "has been there" to place limits until they learn about the limits that exist in the world. The goal of limit setting should be teaching teens about very real limits of the world. Limits should never be permanent walls around a teen. Generally speaking, limits should decrease over time but can be put back up if the teenager is not able to tolerate freedom or makes inappropriate choices. This creates a cycle where they are decreased again, allowing the teen to earn back freedom and responsibility. Theoretically this cycle can continue undefinedly until the teen is finally able tolerate freedom or is old enough to leave home and make their own decisions in life. In the meantime it is the parent's job, and teen's secret desire, that parents set the limits.

Secret #7: Teens often feel insecure and anxious about growing up. They will act as if they are a superman. They talk about what they will do when they are old enough to be on their own and although they can't wait to be an adult, the truth is that they are frightened. Feelings of insecurity will crack their thin shell of confidence. Parents see these cracks in their annoyance and anger. Anger being just one way to try and seal up those cracks.

The challenge is to increase their feelings of confidence to succeed in life. This confidence comes from experience and experience from failure. Why failure? Because failure is a part of the learning cycle. And because teens (and adults) fail a lot. Better to acknowledge failure now and not be surprised when it occurs. Toward this end, parents need to model failure for teens. Be willing to confess to times when you were unsuccessful and what it taught you. When teens fail, reframe it as a normal part of life that teaches us how not to behave in the future. Don't make a huge personal issue of it. Stay focused on solutions. You have just discovered one solution" that won't work in the future. Work on those solutions together, or at least, be a strong cheerleader for your teen as he or she works on them.

Secret #8: Teens fail mostly due to inexperience rather than maliciousness. I know this doesn't seem like a big secret but many parents make some of their biggest errors here. Teens are awkward, clumsy, anxious, and unskilled. They have more experience as a child then as an adult. When they are in trouble they will draw on childish ways more often than adult ways because they are more familiar with childish ways.

The challenge is to keep from overreacting to their behaviors and teach them the skills necessary to overcome failures. As we have said before, spent time with them, discuss rules and values, and model skills. Most importantly be patient with them. Remember what it was like for you as a teen. No, really remember! The mind has built in defense that causes us to remember the good and ignore the bad. But those memories are still there. Dig deep and meditate on what it felt like to be a teen. This will give you more empathy for them and empathy will give you more patience to teach them.

Secret #9: Teens want respect too! Parents are big on demanding teens be respectful but they neglect the reality that teens want it too. Respect is a reciprocal commodity. The more you give, the more you gain. The truth is that most teens don't respect adults because they don't feel respected.

The challenge is to mutually respect your teen when frustrated by his or her behavior. Respect is not the same as acceptance. You don't have to accept a teen's behavior to be respectful. Common courtesies, such a "thank you" or knocking on their bedroom door before entering, are simple ways to respect a teen. Respect their privacy and never lecture a teen in front of friends.

Take teens seriously. Don't use "get into their face confrontation" to discipline. Don't attack them personally. Stay focused on the problem you want to change. Do confront them in an assertive manner. Do address inappropriate behavior by staying focused on the problem and the desired solution. Do listen to their side of the problem before you talk. Repeat back what you heard your teen say and try understand where they are coming from. Parents always have veto power over teens. Just don't abuse the power.

Secret #10: Teens want to have fun. This is the best secret of all. It's hard enough growing up and discovering who you are without having some fun every once in a while. The challenge is finding a balance between fun and responsibilities. Make some verbal agreements about whom, when, where, and what is considered appropriate fun. Make plans for fun together. Show an interest in their fun even if you feel you can't relate to their music, games, or movies. Break up responsibilities into small chunks of time where fun or relaxation can take place. Involve your teen in various mediums, such as, music, art, sports, writing, and popular culture. Don't impose your interests on your teen but don't let them go totally unsupervised either.

Now that the secrets are out, try one or two on your teen in the next week. Don't make a big deal about knowing the truth. They won't admit to it and just look at you like you're crazy. Having a relationship with your teen is possible. Even a good one!

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REGISTER TO VOTE I wonder how many 18 year old high school seniors are registered to vote. For that matter, are YOU registered to vote, Parent? If you aren't, then you have no right to gripe about anything happening in our country today.

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"Perhaps they are not stars in the sky, but rather openings where our loved ones shine down to let us know they are happy."

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<*> Article

JOAN'S SOUND OFF!

Something that concerns me greatly is the way communications - tv, radio, newspapers, cable, movie companies are being gobbled up by giant conglomerates. Clear Channel has, in the last three years, purchased 1200 radio stations! If you don't think that gives them censorship clout, I've got a real nice bridge to sell you.

The Dixie Chicks are being punished because one of the members used her First Amendment Rights.

Anti-war songs are banned from many stations, while the managers are told to play patriotic music, stuff that makes listeners cry or salute. Anybody remember "Blowin' In The Wind"?

But it isn't only censorship; this monopoly by a few presents a real danger to America's citizens. In Minot ND recently, a train derailment released toxic fumes, threatening the residents. Police immediately called all seven radio stations, six of which are owned by Clear Channel, to alert the people. Not one of the six had a live person to answer the phones because all the news, music and commentary is now "canned" and only sounds like it's local.

Powers in the communications field can squash news stories: Disney recently killed a story about how the company didn't screen workers at their parks against pedophile criminal records. Duh!!!

On Friday, April 4, 9 p.m., the PBS program NOW with Bill Moyers focused on proposals by the Bush FCC to end long-standing safeguards designed to promote diversity of media ownership. To learn more: http://www.alternet.org/story.html?StoryID=15482

And then there is Patriot II -- Putting harsh curbs on our civil liberties will NOT make us safer nor stop terrorists. Please read this for your child's sake. If this passes, citizens who only "appear" to be dangerous to America (read NO actual proof) can lose their citizenship.
http://www.alternet.org/story.html?StoryID=15541
Danger! Danger, Will Robinson!

Thoreau says: To speak the Truth, you need two people; one to say it, and one to hear it.

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"What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us."

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THE QUIZ

These little simple questions are harder than you think--it just shows you how little we pay attention to the common place things of life.Put your thinking caps on. Mind teasers of COMMON KNOWLEDGE. No cheating! No looking around! No using anything on or in your desk or computer! Can you beat 23?? (The average is 7) Write down your answers and check answers (on the bottom) AFTER completing all the questions.

1. On a standard traffic light, is the green on the top or bottom?

2. How many states are there? (Don't laugh, some people don't know)

3. In which hand is the Statue of Liberty's torch?

4. What six colors are on the classic Campbell's soup label?

5. What two letters don't appear on the telephone dial? (No cheating!)

6. What two numbers on the telephone dial don't have letters by them?

7. When you walk does your left arm swing w/your right or left leg?

8. How many matches are in a standard pack?

9. On the United States flag is the top stripe red or white?

10. What is the lowest number on the FM dial?

11. Which way does water go down the drain, counter or clockwise?

12. Which way does a "no smoking" sign's slash run?

13. How many channels on a VHF TV dial?

14. Which side of a women's blouse are the buttons on?

15. On a NY license plate, is New York on the top or bottom?

16. Which way do fans rotate?

17. Whose face is on a dime?

18. How many sides does a stop sign have?

19. Do books have even-numbered pages on the right or left side?

20. How many lug nuts are on a standard car wheel?

21. How many sides are there on a standard pencil?

22. Sleepy, Happy, Sneezy, Grumpy, Dopey, Doc. Who's missing?

23. How many hot dog buns are in a standard package?

25. On which playing card is the cardmaker's trademark?

26. On which side of a venetian blind is the cord that adjusts the opening

between the slats?

27. On the back of a $1 bill, what is in the center?

28. There are 12 buttons on a touch tone phone. What 2 symbols bear no digits?

29. How many curves are there in the standard paper clip?

30. Does a merry-go-round turn counter or clockwise?

Don't look at answers below until you complete all the questions:

1. Bottom

2. 50 (please tell me you got this one!)

3. Right

4. Blue, red, white, yellow, black, &gold

5. Q, Z

6. 1, 0

7. Right

8. 20

9. Red

10. 88

11. Counter (north of the equator)

12. Towards bottom right

13. 12 (no #1)

14. Left

15. Top

16. Clockwise as you look at it

17. Roosevelt

18. 8

19. Left

20. 5

21. 6

22. Bashful

23. 8

24. Did you notice there wasn't one?

25. Ace of spades

26. Left

27. ONE

28. *, #

29. 3

30. Counter

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Feds Warn Heart Patients on Smallpox Shot
March 26, 2003 12:46 PM EST WASHINGTON - Health officials are recommending that people with heart disease not get vaccinated against smallpox as authorities investigate a possible link between the vaccine and heart problems.

JOAN'S NOTE: Smallpox isn't easy to catch - ask your doctor.

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"The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it." Dudly Moore

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MORE THOUGHTS written down by my Bill, and found later by me...

If you want to catch a fish, THINK like a fish. :)

How to play Golf by Arnold Palmer
Hit the damn ball as hard as you can, then go find it and hit it again!

The Choices we make, dictate the Life we lead.

Amen.

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PRIZES!!!!!

Tell me the worst mistake you think Parents make in raising their child.

The Top Ten entries each receive a jim-dandy computer learning game. Some of them speak in three languages. Value $20 each.

mistakes@joanbramsch.com

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Twenty years from now you will be more
disappointed by the things that you didn't do
than by the ones you did do. So throw off the
bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch
the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream.
Discover. -- Mark Twain

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<*> Letters from EP Parents

Joan -- I correspond with a pair of twin 10year olds in England. I met them and their folks at work at Moaning Cavern, a destination spot for tourists in Northern California . Hannah and Amy are sweethearts and they often ask me for help with homework projects or my opinion for class surveys. The following is an exchange I had a couple of days ago with Hannah. Her mom, BTW emailed me right back, thanking me for my input and told me she was glad an American had answered her little girl who watches more TV than is always good for her and does not always understand what a chant might mean.

These are my thoughts as plain and simple as I could make them.

Hi Marcie
Today my best friend gave me a C.D. of all my fave songs.

Stop the War!!!
Hannah

Darlin',

If I could Stop the War and send all the young men and women, whether American, British, Australian, Canadian, Kuwaites, Kurdistanis and others even the young Iraquis home to their families I would do so in a heartbeat. Or as some folks in the states say, "in a New York Minute".

I used to think that was a strange thing to say and I didn't really understand what a New York minute was. But one morning, Sept.11, 2001 I turned on my TV and saw what could happen in New York in a minute. More than 3,000 people were killed.

Some very evil people were responsible for that happening and I pray very hard that it never happens again. Not in New York, not in Paris, not in London not anywhere.

Our brave soldiers, mine and yours are out there trying to ensure that these things won't happen again. Our Soldiers, Marines, Airmen and Sailors are trying to stop a very evil man in Iraq from taking boys your age from their homes in his own country and making them go fight his terrible war.

So instead of saying Stop the war, I say stop the Evil so our soldiers and theirs can go home to their Moms and Dads, their wives and husbands, their children and their little sisters.

I agree with you Hannah, this war has to stop, but it can't stop until the people who started it are caught and punished. Until then, I'm praying very hard and flying my flag in my window, right next to a special banner with blue stars, that shows I have two children in the military so that people know that, while I wish there was no war, I support the men and women who have to be there and maybe get hurt stopping the evil.

I sure hope you are doing the same thing to show your support of your brave British troops.

Love Marcie
------------
Joan,

I found your site in an ezine directory. I'll send you copies of the
two books that you've requested.

Parents have a tough job. I would suggest that they take a look at
the Emotional Security Toolkit, The Science of Emotion section, to
learn about how emotions impact the heart, which impacts health and
performance. Then move on to one of the tools and practice it
frequently. Once they're able to shift the feeling state and manage
emotions more effectively, then communication with their kids should
improve, (or at least the parents will drain lees vital emotional
energy in the process.) The HeartMath Solution and Overcoming
Emotional Chaos books are also excellent resources for adults.

http://heartmath.com/store/overcoming_chaos.html
Http://heartmath.com/store/heartmath-solution-book.html

JOAN'S NOTE: I recommend this material. I am so impressed by the Heartmath site. Such good advice. Such good opportunities to learn how to do better! Bravo. Go see for yourself.

-------------
From an EP GrandParent:

I feel like I did in WW II.
I'm doing what I saw my Mother do
She quietly prayed,as she did each chore
And wondered how she could do more.
As a child. I watched her as her day was done
She'd sit at her desk and write to her Sons
Each morning she'd check the flag with stars of blue
Hung proudly in the window, One for Army, and Navy too
Her sacrifice was as silent as theirs
Dad carried on without fan-fare
Now a light in the window for Chris and others
Fighting forces of young Fathers and Mothers
They accept where they have to be
Fighting for the likes of you and me.
Let's simplfy our lives and do our best.
In the hands of God we leave the rest..

Remember those in the Military, always, for they have earned our respect and admiration with their blood.

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If you want to know what is really happening to our economy, Martin Weiss has a new book. I've been reading his no holds barred newsletter for over 20 years.
Http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0471429988/ref=nosim/crashprofits3-20

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Positive Thinking for Kids
By Elizabeth Pantley, Author of Kid Cooperation and Perfect Parenting http://www.pantley.com/elizabeth/
During their growth and development, children go through many stages of self-doubt. They are always comparing themselves to others, and they often see themselves as coming up short. As parents, we can offset this natural tendency in our children by giving them the skills to think more positively. It is important that you really listen to your children, and help them overcome their negative thoughts and beliefs. This is, of course, easier to do if you practice positive thinking yourself.

==============
<*> Book Reviews

For Children Who Were Broken - Elia Wise
Review: by Eileen Stuart for EP Ezine
For adults who were treated badly as children. This is a booklet length poem for survivors. It brings out what makes the struggle to grow up secure and whole so difficult for those who have lived through pain. Just the thing to help them understand that you understand.
http://earthrenewal.org/missing_and_exploited_children.htm#For Children Who Were Broken
------------------
THE MIND BODY MAKEOVER PROJECT by Michael Gerrish may be the consumate health book in 2003. It's obvious he is experienced; it's refreshing that he doesn't overwhelm the reader with "techni-speak." Answering the sets of life questions are worth investing your time. The results can be most revealing and helpful in creating the mind/body program needed for success.
http://www.cherylrichardson.com/mind-body/Submitted:
Joan Bramsch

If you want either one of these books, tell me so and I'll put your name in the hat for a drawing. ReviewBooks@joanbramsch.com

==========
<*> This 'n That

1. God wants spiritual fruit, not religious nuts.

2. Dear God: I have a problem. It's me.

3. Growing old is inevitable, it's growing up that is optional.

4. There is no key to happiness. The door is always open.

5. Silence is often misinterpreted, but never misquoted.

6. Do the math. Count your blessings.

7. Faith is the ability to not panic.

8. Laugh every day, it's like inner jogging.

9. If you worry, you didn't pray. If you pray, don't worry.

10. As a child of God, prayer is kind of like calling home every
day.

11. Blessed are the flexible, for they shall not be bent out of
shape.

12. The most important things in your home are the people.

13. When we get tangled up in our problems, be still. God wants
us to be still so He can untangle the knot.

14. A grudge is a heavy thing to carry.

15. He who dies with the most toys is still dead.

16. We do not remember days, but moments. Life is moving too
fast, so enjoy your precious moments.

17. Nothing is real to you until you experience it, otherwise
it's just hearsay.

18. It's all right to have a pity party; just know when to move on.
19. Surviving and living your life successfully requires courage.
The goals and dreams you're seeking require courage and risk-taking. Learn from the turtle-- it only makes progress when it sticks out its neck.

20. Life is uncertain; eat dessert first.

===============
If you read this far, let me know: yes@joanbramsch.com

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The ultimate oxymoron: "Holy War"
===============================
FEED THE HUNGRY:
http://www.thehungersite.com
http://www.heifer.org/

We are not going to be able to operate our
Spaceship Earth successfully nor for much longer unless we see it as a
whole spaceship and our fate as common. It has to be everybody or nobody.
-Buckminster Fuller

NEXT ISSUE: More of the best I can find for you, dear Parent. And those EP
Bulletins will continue, if sporadically.

* . (\ *** /) * . *
. * ( \ (_) / ) * Guardian Angel * .
. (_ / | \ _) . * .
* . /____\ * . . *
In the meantime, here is an angel sent to watch over you for me.
===================================
FROM BILL: We are Angels born with but one wing,
In order to fly we must embrace one another.
===================================
Till next time, don't forget -- Parenthood is Wonder-filled!
Fondly, Joan
===================================
DISCLAIMER: The Empowered Parenting Ezine is intended to increase your
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any products or services mentioned. If expert assistance or counseling is
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© 1999-2003 Joan Bramsch/JB INFORMATION STATION.
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ISSN: 1526-2154 - Library Of Congress, Washington DC, USA
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